Message Forums

Quote: Originally posted by herald1 on 06/9/2013

---

At the minute she is renting somewhere and I am still in the house, the eldest child is with me most of the time and the youngest is split between us 50/50.

She is in a rush because she owes her dad money that she has borrowed to set herself up in the new place and he wants it back.

---

Quote: Originally posted by elizaD on 04/9/2013

---

You could always just sit back for a while and do nothing, see if she wants to get the ball rolling. As long as she is letting you see the children, and making no further financial demands on you, why the rush??? She's up to something, you just haven't fugured out exactly what it is yet.

---

Quote: Originally posted by Jan P on 07/9/2013

---

Quote: Originally posted by herald1 on 03/9/2013Exactly trust went the day she confessed to everything, we have now reached check mate , I need to have a good think, cannot really afford to just put it in the hands of the solicitor at £190 + vat per hour

---

---

I'm sorry you can't afford not to.

---

Herald, I'm not understanding something about her haste........she's borrowed money from her dad, but even if you rush the divorce through, where does she think the money to repay him is coming from??

Even if you decide to put the house up for sale, it could take months, or if you buy her out and stay put. you'll have to get the money from somewhere (and as you seem to be looking after the children more than her, I'd seriously think about staying put).......it just doesn't make sense. Even if she's on benefits to top up her part time wages, she's still going to have bills to pay, so won't have spare cash to pay her debt to dad back!!!

Sounds like she is aiming for the family home to be sold and sees this as a solution to all her financial worries.   If you are living there, and for a lot of the time with your children, I would stay put and agree to nothing in the meantime.

Your wife has created the situation as it stands by her actions - don't lose sight of that fact.   She wants you to fall into line with her plans for the future which may not necessarily be what is best for you and your children.  They must always come first, as I'm sure you know, but when emotions are running high and you feel betrayed, it is easy to become embroiled in that whole saga.   

If she owes her dad money - well that's her problem (and her dad's), not yours.   Please don't feel pressured into making decisions just yet, it's very early days.

I do know legal fees can be expensive but perhaps some money invested on this front in the future would be money well spent?