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 Topic: new £5 notes complaints
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05/12/2016 at 12:32pm
Location: Cheltenham
Outfit: Shogun & Swift Challenger or Tent
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A Very Precise Calculation of Exactly How Many Cows Are Being Murdered to Make the New Fivers
By Morgan Harries
The Maths!
Tallow is rendered cow or mutton fat, but for the sake of argument let's go with cows here.
How much do cows weigh? Between 1,100kg for a male (bull) and 720kg for a female. So, on average, a cow weighs 910kg.
The body fat content of an average cow is 25 percent. Therefore, the amount of fat in an average cow's body is 227.5kg.
How many kilograms of this fat is contained in offcuts you could use to make tallow? About 40kg, according to a man at the James Elliott butcher in Islington.
How much tallow is used in one note, according to the Bank of England? "A trace", which chemically means less than 100 parts per million, or 0.01 percent. A polymer consultant I called confirmed that the tallow present in a given polymer would be a fraction of a single percentage.
New £5 notes weigh 0.7g, therefore there is roughly 0.00007 g of tallow present in one £5 note.
How many fivers are in circulation now, and therefore will be around by May of 2017, when all the old paper ones have been phased out? 329 million notes.
To work out how much tallow will be used in total in all of these fivers, we need to multiply 0.00007g by 329 million, which gives us 23,030g, or 23kg.
And if you get about 40kg of tallow-worthy fat from the average cow, how many cows would you need to make every single £5 note in circulation?
JUST OVER HALF OF ONE COW
So while it's estimated that 2.6 million cattle are slaughtered each year for human consumption in the UK, there are nearly 100,000 signatures so far on a petition to save just one cow from being ritualistically murdered and fed into Britain's Royal Mint machines.
Here are some e-petitions that revolve around the same theme – the value of animal life – that currently have less signatures at the time of writing:
– Shutting down the UK's domestic ivory trade has 71,416 signatures.
– Increasing the maximum sentence for animal cruelty charges has 51,473 signatures.
– Ending the badger cull has 63,461 signatures.
Social justice warriors for the win!
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