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I am constantly a-mazed at how many members there are on ukcs THE BEST website in the whole wide worldand as many of ya will know, I like to do me bit and  as many as I can coz it's gr8 to chat to new folks.

So, had a thought that I might post a thread to welcome ALL the New Arrivals, a rare lightbulb moment for me I know!

Now if you've already stumbled upon this site.......you are already about to become and addict.....there's no-o-o-o going back my friends.

Infact I think it'd be a good idea to have this next bit as the homepage

 

Abandon Hope All Ye Who Enter Here!!

But fear not coz help is at hand........if you want to be able to feed your addiction to ukcs and still maintain family relationships, (or just simply survive!), you might wanna get the following set up?

To your right: porta potti, (loo roll and hand wipes optional)

To your left: small table with electric kettle, mug, tea bags and biccies, beneath which you keep copious amounts of bottled water and coolbag for the milk.

Additional extras, (but I find them essential), are a phone and various take away menus for outlets that deliver. This prevents the natives uprising! We're so-o-o-o poplular with our local Chinese that the drivers have our address programmed into their Sat Nav!

But I'm afraid if you're after one of me famous Pattented Electronic Alarm Auto-Ejection Chairs, there's rather a long waiting list. Demand far exceeding the supply at the mo!

They are great thingies though and only known to malfunction when I accidentally 'forgot' to set the alarm or when one of the dogs accidentally unplugged it from the socket, (well trained my pooches).

Admit to having a few probs adapting it for use since the welcome arrival of me new super dooper whoopy doo wireless lappy that darlin' hubby treated me to about five weeks ago though. So far only managed to propel hubby, one dog and one cushion off the settee with it.......could be that me flower power wellies are earthing me I s'pose?

All I really need to now to make my ukcs life complete is one of those tray jobbies that the usherettes at the pictures, (sorry - cinema for those younger members), so that me and lappy never have to part, apart from showering natch!

Well chaps, that just about sums up my advice for handy tips on life with ukcs but in case you're interested we do have a fast growing support group on hand and the next ukcs-anon meeting coming soon to a pc near you!

You'll spot me there, here's my description:

Long red hair, freckles, walks with a limp and flower power walking stick wearing dream catcher dangling from surgical collar, butt ugly and prone to flatulence! Sounds appealing eh? Or, ya could always take a peek at me in my gallery if you're brave!

Just remember, that recognizing you have an addiction is the first step to recovery(though why anybody would want to recover is beyond me!)

My name's hippy chick and I am a ukcs addict....and hope I'm never cured!!!!!!!

...guess you might already have a senseo and drank one to many cafeïne filled cup and is now very hyperactive?

PS: can we have your faxnumber?

yukyukyukyuk 

I started you off again?!?! You weren't stoppable 1

Cheers!

I'll be back!

to read this again now me dish pan hand's have dryed.....

Oh yes and Welcome New B's (or is it just me thats joinded)..

 to you.

You will fine plenty of nutters on here.........................(i'm only joking).........................Glad you found the mad house awell as the funny farm.

me again from one chick to another chick. Just keeping it at the top again for all those newbies out there. Keep em coming

I'm not completely new, but hippy chick has made me smile on several occasions. Thanks to you all for this invaluable site.

I am completely addicted to ukcs...................

thanks for the welcome EVERYONE you all now me new best friends!

(lost old ones and family cos I won't (can't) get off the computer now)

Can't keep up with all these newbies....it's fandabidozy!!!!

Just hope they all get to read this, coz they are so-o-o-o-o gonna need the help and advice of ukcs-anon!

Awft to beddy bo-bos...just hope they all see this...before it's too--o-o-o-o-o-o late!

I mean, if they don't get their order in quick for one of me Pattented Electonic Alarm Auto-Ejection Chairs soon, they'll never get one before C*******s! But we mustn't mention that word till November!

At last a forum that understands humour. Think I might give this a go.

Looked at Conway Owners for a bit but they all got upset when someone said the problem with smoke detectors was the holes the screws left in the canvas.