Advertisement
Message Forums |
|
10/5/2020 at 12:48pm
Location: liverpool
Outfit: lunar
View Profile
Reply
Quote
|
Joined: 16/5/2006 Standard Member
Forum Posts: 0
| Site Reviews Total: | 0 |
|
| Site Reviews 2024: | 0  |
| Site Reviews 2023: | 0 |
| Site Reviews 2022: | 0 |
| Site Reviews 2021: | 0 |
| Site Reviews 2020: | 0 |
| Site Reviews 2019: | 0 |
| Site Reviews 2018: | 0 |
|
| Site Nights 2024: | 0 |
| Site Nights 2023: | 0 |
| Site Nights 2022: | 0 |
| Site Nights 2021: | 0 |
| Site Nights 2020: | 0 |
| Site Nights 2019: | 0 |
| Site Nights 2018: | 0 |
|
Matters of two neighbours :
Hi Max. This is Richard, next door. I’ve been riddled with guilt for a few months and have been trying to getup the courage to tell you face to face. When your not around, I’ve been sharing your wife, day and night, probably more than you. I haven’t been getting it at home recently. I know that’s no excuse. The temptation was just too great. I can’t live with the guilt and hope you’ll accept my sincere apology and forgive me.
Please suggest a fee for usage and I’ll gladly pay you
Regards
Richard
Max, feeling enraged and betrayed, grabbed his shotgun, went next door and shot Richard dead. He returned home, shot his wife, poured himself a stiff drink and sat down on the sofa, Max then looked at his phone and discovered a second text message from Richard:
SECOND TEXT MESSAGE:
Hi Max, Richard here. Sorry about the typo in my last text. I assume you had figured it out and noticed that the damn spell checker had changed “wi-fi” to “wife” Technology huh, It’ll be the death of us all
|
11/6/2020 at 3:28pm
Location:
Outfit:
View Profile
Reply
Quote
|
Joined: 16/10/2007 Diamond Member 
Forum Posts: 6707
Tent Reviews: 1
| Site Reviews Total: | 116 |
|
| Site Reviews 2024: | 0 |
| Site Reviews 2023: | 0 |
| Site Reviews 2022: | 4  |
| Site Reviews 2021: | 0 |
| Site Reviews 2020: | 0 |
| Site Reviews 2019: | 0 |
| Site Reviews 2018: | 15 |
|
| Site Nights 2024: | 0 |
| Site Nights 2023: | 0 |
| Site Nights 2022: | 40 |
| Site Nights 2021: | 0 |
| Site Nights 2020: | 0 |
| Site Nights 2019: | 0 |
| Site Nights 2018: | 98 |
|
A golden oldie
Patton staggered home very late after another evening with his drinking buddy, Paddy. He took off his shoes to avoid waking his wife, Kathleen.
He tiptoed as quietly as he could toward the stairs leading to their upstairs bedroom, but misjudged the bottom step. As he caught himself by grabbing the banister, his body swung around and he landed heavily on his rump. A whiskey bottle in each back pocket broke and made the landing especially painful.
Managing not to yell, Patton sprung up, pulled down his pants, and looked in the hall mirror to see that his butt cheeks were cut and bleeding. He managed to quietly find a full box of Band-Aids and began putting a Band-Aid as best he could on each place he saw blood.
He then hid the now almost empty Band-Aid box and shuffled and stumbled his way to bed.
In the morning, Patton woke up with searing pain in both his head and butt and Kathleen staring at him from across the room.
She said, ‘You were drunk again last night weren’t you?’
Patton said, ‘Why you say such a mean thing?’
‘Well,’ Kathleen said, ‘it could be the open front door, it could be the broken glass at the bottom of the stairs, it could be the drops of blood trailing through the house, it could be your bloodshot eyes, but mostly ……. it’s all those Band-Aids stuck on the hall mirror.
|
|
|
6025 Visitors online !
Free UKCampsite.co.uk Window Sticker - Recommend to Friend - Add a Missing Campsite
[Message Forums]
[Caravan Sites & Camping]
[Company Listings]
[Features / Advice]
[Virtual Brochure]
[Shop!]
[Reception]
[Competitions]
[Caravans & Motorhomes For Sale]
[Event Diary]
[Contact Us]
[Tent Reviews]
Please note we are not responsible for the content of external sites & any reviews represent the author's personal view only. Please report any error here. You may view our privacy and cookie policy and terms and conditions here. All copyrights & other intellectual property rights in the design and content of this web site are reserved to the UKCampsite.co.uk © 1999 - 2024 |
Advertisement
|
|
|
Topic: joke
via mobile 10/5/2020 at 11:33pm
