If you can go mid week you should give Shell Island a try - it's the weekends that it gets busy especially bank holidays. We went for two weeks in the summer holidays last year and from Sunday lunchtime until Friday afternoon it's like a different place.
We have been 2 or 3 times a year in the holidays and most bank holidays for the past few years and to be honest the place is so magical, unless you are pitched next to the family from hell (and lets face it you could get that anywhere) it's worth it. We have never had a bad time. A couple of years ago a large family group pitched up near to us (have to be 20m away) and proceeded to have their car stereo on full volume. I gave them about 10 minutes and then went over and asked if there was any chance they could turn it down as it was giving me a migraine ( I wasn't lying, it would have done) they did and we never heard any more music all weekend - the funniest thing was though - the mother snored like a train and kept us all awake most of the night.
We are a large group and there will probably be 6 families with kids going and yes I suppose we can be a bit noisy if we are all sitting together having a drink in the evening but we always quiet down at 11pm - many of us go to bed then just leaving a handful chatting and that's how most of the site is.
I think it has a mostly undeserved bad reputation. Have a look at other sites a bit further along the coast towards Barmouth to see if you can get on to those easily if it does all go wrong and then give Shell Island a go.
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